Dear Catie, my mind is blown.

One of the biggest problems with people in relationships, marriage or otherwise, is a lack of understanding in this very passage from Allegiant.

“I used to think that when people fell in love, they just landed where they landed, and they had no choice in the matter afterward. And maybe thats true of beginnings, but It’s not true of this, now.

I fell in love with him. But I dont just stay with him by default as if there is no one else available to me. I stay with him because I choose to, every day that I wake up, every day that we fight or lie to each other or disappoint each other. I choose him over and over again, and he chooses me.”

I don’t know about you, but that’s powerful. It has nothing to do with religious limitations or mpral obligation.

A lot of people leave when the fire is out. They don’t realize the many ways to start a fire. They try a couple of ways but give up. If X amount of tries didn’t work, then X more will do little else.

It’s a choice. A choice to give up. A choice to seek.  A choice to stay. And we will always face this choice.

I think our readers can benefit from that passage. I know I did. It blew my mind.

I remain an optimist.  That will be hard to change. There is always a way.

There is always a choice.


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