You and I both know the pull of guilt when we look back on these and go, “WHERE DID I GET OFF THE DANG WAGON?” Today, I aim to revisit that wagon, pull a few pieces of food off of it, and go forth to conquer my own quest of life.
Apologize only when I regret.
I need this, especially nowadays. I’m separated (divorce is still in the works, but dang, it’s expensive…) and while I still feel like I am in the right and that this is the best thing I could have done, the guilt not from myself but others looms over me. I need to fight it better. I need to not apologize to anyone for my decisions unless I regret it.
I’m kind of proud of myself about this one? Sure, we all have our days, but I remain the ray of sunshine I wanted to be. It’s funny, because when I was younger, everyone adored the way I could smile and light up a room with my seemingly endless joy and energy. I could float between conversations with people and make everyone feel noticed, important, and rather than it be taxing, it was rewarding. Now, I haven’t been anywhere in the physical world, not really, but I’ve joined a guild of people who are NOT roleplayers and simply play the GW2 game as a game between friends, as a hobby, as something ‘for fun’. There’s literally no strings attached, no drama (comparatively to roleplayer’s drama), and it’s a new group, a new atmosphere.. New hope. I’ve been cheerful, happy, pleasant – and people seem to really like me! When I walk in, they’re happy to see me! Now, I know what this says about me (that I seek out approval for others), but I don’t give a damn. It’s nice to be around a group of people not shaming me for my divorce or other decisions. I’m happy to be able to feel like I can be that happy girl again, and everyone feel it radiating from me.
No more sodas.
Good lawd. I’m so sorry about this one. I should really hop on this bandwagon again. I’m thinking of going from Dr. Pepper to Sprite/Ginger Ale, because at least then it wouldn’t be dark soda, right?
No more fast food.
I would save so much damn money if I did this, but I am having such a hard time deciding what to substitute for it. I don’t me substitute completely. I mean, ANYTHING to replace this with. Right now, dad and I make big dinners so we have left overs, but damn, leftovers of the same spaghetti for weeks (we keep remaking the same spaghetti each week) gets old. I need to learn to cook. How do I learn to cook?! EGADS.
Plan ahead on
school work writing anything and everything.
I need to make time, a routine, and work on my blog and book ideas. More on this in another post.
Write for 30 minutes, every day.
This is still a thing, but again, more on this. ^
I actually just did this one, and my arms hate me.
God, God, God.
I don’t know how I feel about him anymore, to be honest. I’ll write about this as well.
Work on at least two of these resolutions each week.
Ugh. Okay, okay, okay.
Love you, B.